Part 1: A 15 minute conversation where only one person speaks
while the other is not able to use symbolic language.
As the listener in this assignment, I found it to be a difficult
task. I felt overwhelmed. I didn’t have time to gather my thoughts, nor was I able
to find a way to get more information or ask for help in understanding what was
said. The longer the conversation flowed in one direction, the less relevant
the message became. There were many moments I wanted to interrupt or ask a
question based on what was being said but was not able to do so. It left me to
feel that the conversation was not as beneficial as it could have been should
we both been able to speak. It was like being given a
series of season finale episodes. My speaker found this project easy overall because she had
ample to say. Should this conversation occur with a speaker who had very little
to say, it would have been difficult to keep the conversation going.
The
speaker felt freedom to speak whatever was on her mind because I was not able
to stop or interrupt the discussion. She didn’t pause or wait which made it
continuous. Due to my lack of response, she began speaking louder as if it
would help me understand more. The other side of this might be frustration from
the speaker’s end which might also lead to a more stern and rigid speech.
Facial
expressions for happiness, sadness, anger, surprise, fear, and disgust are the
same across all cultures. If two cultures met for the first time the culture
with the ability to speak would greatly have the upper hand with communicating
their ideas, because they had an additional means to doing so. This allows for
the back and forth to confirm the understanding of what is implied. Usually
when an idea is first announced, it’s verbally, and then followed with a visual
to help confirm the idea.
The
speaking culture might feel frustration or pity for the non-speaking culture. They
may even reframe from speaking because they may not want to offend the other
since they could not speak. The speaker might feel bad to vent their concerns
while the non-speaker was not able to do the same.
Autistic,
deaf and mentally disabled persons all struggle with spoken language. We tend
to educate them with sign language, flash card, word substitutions to form a
common communication. We know life is a struggle without communication and
worry for those who do not possess this ability. Typically when communication
with these less fortunate individuals we may speak slowly or loudly thinking
this will help their understanding.
Part
2: 15
minutes communicating without any physical embellishments.
Although it was difficult to get through the 15 minutes, the lack of voice
tones made this conversation fitting to discuss instructions or sad circumstances. It seemed
to lack all emotion, effectiveness, and reality of the conversation. The human
face is extremely expressive, able to express countless emotions without saying
a word and unlike some forms of nonverbal communication, facial expressions are
universal.
Speaking in a monotonous voice makes it difficult to hold
a conversation. When your voice pitch doesn’t change, it’s difficult for the
other partner to keep interest in what you’re saying. They will tune out
quickly. It is not believable or boring. The use of movement and facial expression are extremely
important in communicating. When your nonverbal signals match up with the words
you’re saying, they increase trust and understanding. When they don’t, they
generate tension, mistrust, and confusion.
Facial expression can substitute for a verbal message. For example, a person's
eyes can often show a more vivid message than words do.
Body movement may add to or complement a verbal message. For example, a coach
who pats a person on the back in addition to giving praise can increase the
impact of the message.
Many
people have difficulty reading body language. The term, “action
speaks louder than words" is true. The benefit of reading body language helps to identify
deception. While words can be deceptive, the human body is not a good liar.
Another benefit of reading body language will be an awareness to understand
social situations and tell how comfortable others around you are.
Circumstances,
where it might be beneficial to not reading body language, might be a
kidnapping because you wouldn’t want the kidnapper to read your fear, because
you don’t want them to know they have the upper hand. This may also not be a
benefit in a deal or purchase. Buying a new home, you may reframe from showing
excitement. Lastly... when approached by a bear as you need to maintain a calm
voice.
Both your post and your experiment were very well done. I faced many of the same challenges that you did in performing your experiment. I found the conversation getting uninteresting and hard to move forward because my partner felt the pressure of doing all of the talking and often ran out of things to say, leaving him asking me simple, random yes and no questions. Your thoughts on the deaf, autistic and mentally disabled persons struggling with spoken communications is interesting, because your words on the page reflect exactly how those of us who have the ability speak consider those who don't, as we often refer to them as those who are "less fortunate." Mind you, I am not being critical in anyway, I think as humans we cherish (and rightfully so) the gift of the spoken language and the ability to communicate with ease. You paragraph though, reminded me of something my sister in law once said. She was born with Spina Bifida and was in a wheel chair her entire life. When by chance of a miracle she became pregnant and it was time for the amnio test, her doctor said, "I assume if your baby has Spina Bifida you will want to abort?" I still remember the look on her face and remember her answer, which of course, was "no." My point to all of this is that I think as "speakers" we project that non-speakers must be "unfortunate" and I often wonder if they feel that way. I think that might be a good question to ask someone who is deaf but did not always have sign language to communicate.
ReplyDeleteI thought your post was really well thought out and interesting to read. I agree with you about the conversations lacking a beneficial feeling. When you can not engage in the conversation with others it kind of makes you feel like you are on the outside of things. In regards to the monotone speaking I also felt like the emotion was missing. It's pretty cool how the meaning of a word can change with the use of our different emotions.
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ReplyDeleteI liked your examples, but in the case with the kidnapper, wouldn't the kidnapper be the one who receives the benefit of being able to read body language?
ReplyDeleteSuppose that your birthday is coming up. However, your friends give off signs through body language that may indicate a surprise is awaiting you, thus the surprise does not have as much of an impact as it would have been if you were unaware of it in the first place.
I really liked your explanation in part1 on how it felt to be as the nonspeaking person. You did a good job describing how frustrating it felt.
ReplyDeleteI don't know if I agree with you on how the speaking culture would treat the nonspeaking one, but maybe that's just me being pessimistic. I think the speaking culture would act more superior, but your thoughts are very interesting as well. Great Post!
I too also struggled in both parts of the experiment. For part b, the people who I conducted the experiment with got frustrated with me, but did not completely lost their interest. I guess if the conversation was much longer, they probably would also lose interest. I also agree with you and how the lack of expression or tone would have a possibility of creating mistrust or tension or also confusion. It for sure created tension when I conducted my experiment since they could not stand listening to my monotonous voice. That is when I realized that both body and spoken language are very important when communicating and both must be used at all times. All in all, you have thoroughly explained your experiment well :)
ReplyDelete"The longer the conversation flowed in one direction, the less relevant the message became."
ReplyDeleteLoved this comment as I recognize the same problem from big meetings where it is difficult to get your point across. By the time you manage to get a word in edgewise, the conversation has moved on and it is too late. So it is even worse if you can't use spoken language to insert your ideas into the discussion.
"They may even reframe from speaking because they may not want to offend the other since they could not speak."
This is a very polite view of the world. If you think of how the immigrant population is often treated in this country, you would recognize that the speaking culture is not always so considerate of non-speakers.
Good examples of real life examples of this situation, but anyone who is limited in their ability to speak "normally", either due to age, culture or disability, will experience this situation.
Good description of Part B.
"When your nonverbal signals match up with the words you’re saying, they increase trust and understanding. "
Precisely. And when they don't match, that is a sign that your words are not to be trusted. This has significant implications on success and survival. Being able to read body language is the difference between recognizing a trustworthy, honest person and detecting a social "cheater" who might take advantage of you. Good discussion on this in the section on adaptive benefits.
There is natural variation in all of our abilities to read body language, just as with any trait, but there are specific groups that have significant impairment in reading body language, such as those in the autism spectrum and also (to a certain degree) those who are blind.
The final question doesn't ask when you shouldn't use body language but when you should perhaps not READ it. So under what circumstances could body language mislead you, perhaps because you misinterpret or can't understand it? Think of traveling to other countries. Do all cultures use the same system of body language?